This economy sucks

I know, "duh", right? But it's getting me down big time. It's definitely hampering my desire to spend time writing and that's too bad because it's probably something I SHOULD do.  I am still having fun with recipes. It's just tarnished by my moods.

My husband really wanted me to try red velvet cupcakes. So, last week I found a recipe from a Bobby Flay Food Network challenge. I found the cupcakes kind of bland but Jeff went nuts for them. So did others who had some (though that's always a dicey opinion to rely on - what are they going to say 'these are terrible'?). I'm going to make them again today because I've got enough frosting left over from the first batch for a whole new batch and I halved the recipe the first time!!! I know people like it layered on but c'mon.

I really want to try another recipe to compare, but I know this one made Jeff happy so I'll stick with it this time.

By the way - if you're ever trying one of my culinary attempts - please don't give undue praise. It doesn't help me weed out the crap recipes and it makes it hard for me to tell if something is really good. I once had a friend over and I made a fish recipe. Put simply, it was disgusting. I think the fish was bad (though I had purchased it that day). The whole kitchen stunk and Jeff, who usually pokes his head in to grab some of whatever I've cooked, beelined for peanut butter and jelly. I have known this friend for years and so felt I could be candid  - oh screw it, I'm always candid - I put my fork down and made a face. My friend said "oh no, it's good" (as she pushed food around her plate). To this day, she claims it was a good meal. Not helpful... comically gracious and I love her for it... but not helpful.

Last week I made another Food Network recipe - Lamb burgers wrapped in prosciutto. These are great but I kept thinking they were missing something. Like some sort of sour cream topping. Something "cool" to go with all the richness. I'll toy with it. The recipe is definitely a keeper.

I haven't had any hilarious mistakes occur or any cuts or bruises to report. Maybe I'm more cautious when I'm bummed. Plus, everything has been easy. Blech. Save us Obama. (Yeah, I know that's not realistic, but I gotta have some beacon of hope.)

Ok ok. I haven't written about my kitchen escapades in a few days. That is not to say that I haven't been cooking...

Saturday, I took a cooking class about knife skills (!!) at The New School of Cooking in Culver City. When I got there, it seemed like the class was going to be crammed but there was an open space for the longest time right next to me. So, I moved the chair and spread myself out only to quickly get a little hand-slapping from the teacher. Five minutes in and I'm the troublemaker. 

They were right to have me put the chair back  - a guy showed up right as class was starting and needed that very seat. But now I was mad that I was tsked tsked and almost left giving myself the excuse that the class was going to be too crowded (I'm such an idiot). But I stayed and, soon after an intro, we opened up the tables and had plenty of room to learn and work.

It was a great class. We learned about the various types of knives, knife care and then the techniques. I HIGHLY recommend this to anyone who wants to pick up some beginner skills. It doesn't hurt, also, that the cost is only around $85  - much cheaper than some of the other cooking schools in Los Angeles. Oh, and (of course) we got to feast on the dishes we'd prepared.

I signed up for another right away - yeast breads. So excited.

By the bye, this is the first cooking class I've actually taken though it's the third I've signed up for and PAID for. The previous two were at the Epicurean school and I had planned to meet up with my good friend. Our genius idea was to get together early for a drink. One led to three and we literally ended up drunk on Sunset, riding the bull at the Saddle Ranch. I didn't become a better cook that day but I did acquire several bruises... stupid bull.

Sorry Epicurean... I'm sure you'll get your shot at my love eventually.

After class, I whipped home to practice my new learnings. I made a scalloped potato dish using a recipe the school gave us but ad-libbed with some gruyere cheese. I also made a split pea soup. Both were pretty good! I can't post the potato recipe but I can link to the soup:

Split Pea Soup with Bacon and Rosemary

I didn't have leeks (boo) so those were not included. I also blended 2/3 of the soup after it was cooked to give it a creamier flavor. I know - so genius. 

 

To Blanche

Today is the day after the day I found out a close family friend lost her mother. It's one of those things that hits you in patches and reminds you of all things come and gone. The daughter of this particular woman is someone who sat with my mother in recovery  - after both women gave birth to their second child. For my mom, it was me. For this friend, it was a son. As you can imagine, our families have been intertwined for some time. So, we have all spent many holidays, major events and, of course, minor occurrences together.

Tonight, we made lamb with a cherry port sauce. We enjoyed it while watching a movie about family, life, tragedy and celebration. Though the characters in this film had  a very different path than the people in my life... the themes were universal. Thus, I can relate and in my relation I'm reminded of my mom, my family and most immediately, my friend's mom. It's a nice coincidence, then, that the cherries we used for dinner were from Michigan and were gifts from this same friend who lost her mom. 

In fact, we were all in Northern Michigan together this past summer. It's an exquisite place to visit and we were lucky to get there. We were especially lucky because we spent time with Blanche. My husband got to meet her, we got to have a nice happy hour with her and I got to say hello and good-bye for the last time.

So, thank you Blanche, for being part of my life. The fact that you left on your own terms and didn't neglect to have your final happy hour reminds me of my mom's final passage. The two of you are sharing a gin and tonic somewhere and we are, for now, enjoying these cherries in celebration of you.

Here is the recipe:

Lamb Chops with Dried Cherries and Port

Ups and Downs

Ok - so I did hurt myself today. Once was prior to cooking. A nice burn on my finger from pulling toast out of our toaster/oven. It's easy to do when the toaster oven isn't on the counter, but on the first shelve (read: near the floor, requiring one to stoop) of a small baker's rack. Ah, small kitchens.

So, I made a marinade. It's got macadamia nuts, coffee, molassis, chili... etc etc. I'll throw some pork tenderloins in that mix and hope for the best. If it's good, I'll put it up (if I can find a link).

This recipe did lead to a health issue I've experienced before... What's the trick to dicing up jalopenos (or other) without choking to death? I'm sure a bigger kitchen with ventilation would help. Anything else? I did wisen up and do the mincing with gloves on. I have been that genius who rubs my eyes after touching chilis. But mid-way through I coughed so hard my husband (from his seat in front of football playoffs) called out in worry.

I also put together a little stir-fry using leftover beef tenderloin and uncooked broccoli. I found a peanut sauce and assembled it all in a wok. It's terrible. Not so bad that I won't eat it (I hate the waste)... but it won't be my favorite lunch this week. I think I overcooked the broccoli and the peanut sauce was just bland. I haven't really found a good peanut sauce... or good recipes for the wok. My mom had a few that I remember loving... I wish she'd kept them tucked in her files. I'd love some good resource...

I ended on a high note (thank goodness). I pulled a recipe for mashed potatoes from Saveur that's classic and simple. It was no culinary feat, but I love knowing I've got an easy, no fail recipe. It calls for a ricer and a TON of cream and butter. (Note: I halved the butter. 8 tbsp AND heavy cream just seemed like a good idea only if I was interested in drumming up a heart attack.) Jeff had two servings right from the pan.

I'm still pissed about my boule but I'm done in the kitchen for a while. Well... maybe I'll try again later.

An update to the boule...

Well  - it's still a very odd looking "round" of bread. I have to say, though, if you love crust (and I do) it's pretty delicious. I mean, that's all it is pretty much!

Boule-shhhhhhhh******

So, I attempted a boule today. Now, I know that dough is one of those things that can be so easy but then one wrong move - temperature, too much kneading, too much flour, too little flower - can screw it all up. And, today, that's just what I did. My boule did not appear to do anything it was supposed to do. 

I thought the recipe was screwball. But then, one search on google and I found another blogger who not only used this exact recipe but also appeared to have great success. I'd love to re-type the recipe here but I think that might not be ok with Cooking Light. 

Here's the thing - I mixed everything as specified and I was supposed to come out with a sticky dough that I turn out to a floured surface. Then, I was to add a flour/salt mixture little by little until the dough appeared smooth and elastic. It never did. I got frustrated after a while (natch) and just dumped the remainder of the flour mixture on my dough. It continued to be a fairly sticky gob. BUT I CONTINUED! (Most would have tossed the mess, I think.)

I figured - hey - it could still work. So I let it rise. It didn't. Was my house too cold? Was my yeast too old? What the frig?!

BUT I CONTINUED...

I didn't have walnuts for the bread... and didn't really want them in there anyhoo. So I just set it up for it's next round of rising. This time, I ended up being gone for a while. I know, I know, it said an hour in the recipe. But at this point, I knew I'd blown it so I gave up on following instructions. (Typically what gets me into trouble.)

I get home and - ALAS -it's risen! But I pull the towel off and the edge of the dough sticks and pshhhhhhhhhhhhh out goes the air.

So - you think - at this point, I should toss it. 

I didn't. 

It's cooking as I type. But I know it will be some odd cracker meets brick type of grossness.

The good news is, I haven't hurt myself in the kitchen. I may have written that too soon because I still have to take the bread out of the oven and there is always room for casualties in that endeavor. But no other burns or lacerations. Just frustration.

Any thoughts? Anyone?

[a letter to Mom]

I started this blog such a long time ago and failed, completely, to even add a SECOND post. How pathetic. Reminds me of the many things you wanted to start. Remember the mystery novel you thought about writing? Remember the great business ideas you had? If only we could be rewarded for simply thinking these things up. No work needed - just a great idea. Then again, they say the fun is in the journey, not the arrival. So here I go again...

Tomorrow is Jeff and my anniversary and we leave for KC this week. I was hoping it would be late enough in September to give us a bit of a taste of fall. No such luck... it's 75-80 and sunny there. Exactly the same as Los Angeles. I should have remembered that from when we spent all that time with you in September. Beautiful weather up until about October 15, and then it turned cold. Not bitter, just chilly at night and grayer skies. Sort of synonymous with our hearts at the time. Now that I'm thinking of it, I'm so glad it was gorgeous and warm through September since it allowed us such memorable mornings and evenings on the patio.

On to my cooking!

As we're leaving soon, I didn't make too many recipes today. In honor of tomorrow's 2 year anniversary, I prepped a nice fish dish  of halibut that's served over a bed of lentils and sweet potatoes. (Recipe below  - it's from Real Simple) I think it's going to be nice but it's a new recipe and Jeff already gave me a so-so look for just the lentil/sweet potato mix. I'll let you know how it turns out. I hope it's good because it seems like it's really healthy!

Did I tell you how much of a fish snob I've become? I used it love fish just for the reason that it was the lowest calorie option on every menu. Now, I'd rather have steak. First of all, it seems like I'm often disappointed when I opt for fish unless we're somewhere I can really trust it's going to be good. We took you to Restaurant Shiro (where Jeff worked for so long). Now THAT is the place to get the BEST fish in town. But then there's also the Water Grill downtown and Ocean Seafood in Santa Monica. Funny... I think we took you to all of those at some point or another. 

Finding the perfect spot to purchase fish has been a challenge. I learned from you long ago, the difference it makes to find a great market - and I don't mean Ralphs. I've tried Whole Paycheck and it's been fairly unreliable. The best fish so far has been from the Santa Monica fish market OR the fish place in the Farmer's Market. The latter is where we purchased the filets today.

The other big main dish I'm cooking today is brisket. I looked for your recipe but I couldn't find it. I think it's probably tucked in your holiday file at home. I'll have to hunt it down.

So, here's the big challenge when cooking in our kitchen. We have one oven. One temperamental, over-heating, ONE rack oven. And it's small. So, I'm really only able to have one item in there at any given time. So I have to be creative about how I time things. Today, like many days of cooking, I messed up because I have this cake in the oven (more on that in a minute) and I desperately need to get the brisket in there. I did the browning and it's sitting with some sauteed onions and beer (and a few other items). The next step is to put my pot in the oven but I can't because of the cake. Meanwhile, it's supposed to cook for three hours! If you had been around, I would have called to ask whether I can just start the cooking process on the burner and then get it into the oven once the cake is done. Without knowing if I'm turning my brisket to rubber, I went ahead with this plan. We'll see how it goes.

I mentioned the cake. This cake looks FANTASTIC. It's got apples and blackberries and booze in the form of apple brandy. I did everything perfectly  - down to taking the time to sift the flower mix - at step, I THINK, you rarely did. It's been in the oven for the requisite 90 minutes. Guess what, I put a toothpick in and it was FAR from clean. This kind of thing frustrates the hell out of me. It used to be our oven that was the issue - literally putting it on 350 means the oven temp is somewhere around broiling. But now we have a thermometer in there and the temp should be regulated. So why is my cake a pile of goo? I put it in for 20 more minutes. We'll see what happens. And, meanwhile, my brisket continues to be cooked on the stovetop. 

I'm starting to think the fish might be our meal tonight.

Now, see, this type of stuff happens to me a little too often. I don't remember you having this trouble. Of course, by the time you were my age, you had a much nicer kitchen. But that's no excuse. I'm a good cook, I know it, but I really need to nail down the ol' read-the-recipes-before-you-start method. In fact, we dined with our friends Sandie and Billy a few nights ago. Sandie is this phenomenal cook... and she's so relaxed. It's this care-free loungy way of cooking that I envy so... because it always ends up being fantastic and she never looks like she's worked up even a single bead of sweat. They come to our place and I'm usually figuring out how to fix some mistake I've made. Oy - please tell me you were like that just a little bit.

Luckily, my recipes do turn out once in a while. And, for the time being, I think I've convinced most of our friends that I took after you when it comes to cooking talent. And, luckily, I have Jeff who will step in and help do the stuff that requires oodles of patience... or who will run to the store for the 10th time to get the one last thing I forgot. You'd be proud of him. He holds me up. So - tomorrow, raise a toast to both of us, but especially him because he deserves tons of credit for sticking with me over the past couple of years.

I miss you tons and I think of you every single day. 

And I love you.

-Dana

The recipes:

Halibut with Lentils and Mustard Sauce

http://food.realsimple.com/realsimple/recipefinder.dyn?action=displayRecipe&recipe_id=1840691

Blackberry and Apple Cake

http://saveur.com/article/Food/Blackberry-and-Apple-Cake

Beer Braised Brisket with Onions

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/BEER-BRAISED-BRISKET-WITH-ONIONS-107586